Jacque Lalleaux was raised by a fashion designer mother and jeweler father in the south of France. Raised as elite society from infancy, Jacques has never wanted anything in his life. With an interest in pursuing new sexual conquests in America (he’s either had every woman in France or has determined them to be unworthy), Jacques arrived at Freese College and expected to rule the school. At first, everything went according to plan. Jacques bedded his orientation leader in the woman’s bathroom of the Physical Therapy building, and then, later that night, a waitress at the local pizza shop. And the stewardess from his flight, also a conquest, was leaving messages on his cell phone.

But the explosion of the Ax-Cell-Erator was ill-timed for Jacques, since it came just at a moment when he was frightened by a squirrel just outside the dorm room window. Since that event, Jacques has been compulsively hoarding acorns, whenever he can get them before the wily squirrels on the Freese campus. His hair has transformed, no matter how much gel he puts into it. And lately he’s seen other squirrels staring at him…

After the explosion, Jacques struck up a new relationship. He fell madly in love with Paula Pophouse, despite a complete lack of physical attraction. Since Paula’s injury in the battle with the frat guys broke her spell, however, Jacques has realized that Paula used her powers on him and forced him to love her. Now Jacques is trying to come to grips with his humiliating transformation and the realization that his emotions have been manipulated at the deepest level.

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